Colossians 3:14-25:  “Love Is Our Bond, The Peace Of God Should Rule In Our Hearts, Each Of Us Have Our Own Domestic Roles And Responsibilities”

 

                                                                        By

Jim Bomkamp

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1.                   In our last study, we looked at verses 1 through 13 of chapter 3.

 

1.1.              We saw that that study began the “hortatory” portion of the book of Colossians, that is the portion that begins the exhortations.  In Paul’s writings, he always told them in the first half of his letters the things that God had done for them, and then in the second half the things that they needed to do for the Lord, their responsibility before the Lord.

 

1.2.              We saw that whereas the Gnostics were trying to get their followers to withdraw from the world as ascetics, Paul exhorted the Colossians here in order to help them to be effective in reaching the world for Christ.

 

1.3.              Paul told the Colossians to keep seeking the things above where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.

 

1.4.              Then, Paul told the Colossians to avoid giving in to five different lusts of the flesh that are common to men and women.

 

1.5.              Paul told the Colossians that they need to consider the members of their body as dead to all of the lusts and sins of the flesh.

 

1.6.              Paul told the Colossians to lay aside many of the sins that cause harm to fellowship and friendship, and we discussed all of those.

 

1.7.              Finally, Paul told the Colossians that as those who have been chosen by God, holy and beloved, that they are to put on the heart of God in all of its various aspects:  compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

 

2.                 In our study today, we are going to look at verses 14-25 of chapter 3.

 

2.1.         Paul will tell us to put on love because it is the bond of our unity.  We will look at the importance of maintaining unity in the body of Christ.

 

2.2.         Paul will tell us to let the peace of Christ rule in our life.

 

2.3.         Paul will tell us to let the word of Christ richly dwell within us and even that we are to share His word with each other and sing different types of songs based upon His word.

 

2.4.         Paul will tells us to do all that we do in the name of Christ

 

2.5.         Finally, Paul will discuss the various domestic roles for the husband, wife, children, and slave, and explain what is the duty of each one in their God-given role.

 

2.6.         The scriptures teach us that God “is not a God of confusion” (1 Cor. 14:33), and that God has created “order,” and even within the church all things are to be done “decently and in order” (1 Cor. 14:40).  We see from the scriptures that part of the orderliness that He has created involves His creating of male and female as well as proper roles for all people, roles of husband, wife, and child in the family, roles of employee and employer, etc.  In the Old Testament we read, for instance, that it was an abomination for a man to dress like a woman and visa versa.  All of us are called to behave properly relative to our God-given roles.  Those over us in authority we are to be in subjection to, and those whom we are over we are to oversee fairly and considerately.  Here, Paul begins to explain those roles that are to exist within the home, and what is the responsibility of each of us within our God-give roles.

 

3.                 VS 3:14  - 14 Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. – Paul tells the Colossians that love is the perfect bond of our unity in Christ, and he tells them that beyond (or foremostly) they need to put on love

 

3.1.         Paul had just admonished the Colossians to put on the heart of God in all of its many facets:  compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, and to forebear and forgive one another.  Now, he alludes to a deeper or more basic motivation for doing all of these things as he says, ‘beyond all these things…’. 

 

3.2.         Paul tells the Colossians here that the very thing that allows us in the body of Christ to have unity together, work together towards common goals, and function as a unit under the direction of the head, Christ, is ‘love’.  Love’ is our ‘bond’ of unity.

 

3.3.         There is a huge need for unity in the body of Christ for unity is essential for any church to please and glorify God, and a lack of unity is a terrible witness to the people of this world. Jesus told His disciples that people in this world would know them by their love for each other:  John 13:35,  By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”  Dividing, fighting, and not getting along gives the church a horrible reputation.    Paul wrote to the Ephesians about how that each of us need to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the body of Christ:  Ephesians 4:1-6, “1 Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, 3 being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as also you were called in one hope of your calling; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of all who is over all and through all and in all.”

 

3.4.         Jesus foresaw the lack of unity that would exist among His body after He left the earth, and thus in that high priestly prayer that He prayed for His followers of all time, He prayed diligently for unity amongst all of His followers:  John 17:20-23, “20 I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; 21 that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me. 22 “The glory which You have given Me I have given to them, that they may be one, just as We are one; 23 I in them and You in Me, that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me.

 

3.5.         There are many things that can cause a lack of unity in the body of Christ.  People in the body of Christ come from all different backgrounds, have different understandings and convictions, can be judgmental of others who don’t share their convictions, can allow bitterness and unforgiveness to develop in their hearts towards others, and many times they simply don’t like each other and don’t want to get along and fellowship with each other.  But, all of this just shows how that these believers are not living for Christ but have self on the throne of their lives and are fulfilling the lusts of their own flesh instead of serving Christ.  We Christians ought to look at the body of Christ in such a way that we realize how precious and all-important it is, the body being that which is the result of the direct work of God Himself, and, we must refuse to allow ourselves bring disunity to the body. 

 

3.6.         Paul explains here the only thing that will provide for us in the body of Christ to exist together in unity is the ‘love’ of God (The Greek word used here is “agape”).

 

3.7.         The words ‘put on’ are in italics because they are not in the text but assumed because the author has been speaking of putting on the Lord Jesus Christ and putting off the old self, or dying to self. 

 

3.8.         Not only is love our bond, it is ‘the perfect bond’ of our unity that we have in Christ.

 

3.9.         Strong’s Enhanced Greek Lexicon has the following entry for this word translated ‘perfect’ here:

 

5047 τελειότης [teleiotes /tel·i·ot·ace/] n f. From 5046; TDNT 8:78; TDNTA 1161; GK 5456; Two occurrences; AV translates as “perfectness” once, and “perfection” once. 1 perfection. 1a the state of the more intelligent. 1b moral and spiritual perfection.

 

3.10.    Strong’s Enhanced Greek Lexicon has the following entry for this word translated ‘bond’:

 

4886 σύνδεσμος [sundesmos /soon·des·mos/] n m. From 4862 and 1199; TDNT 7:856; TDNTA 1114; GK 5278; Four occurrences; AV translates as “bond” three times, and “band” once. 1 that which binds together, a band, bond. 1a of ligaments by which the members of the human body are united together. 2 that which is bound together, a bundle.

 

3.11.    There is a time when division is necessary, but we should only go to this extreme after a group is unrepentant and allowing heretical doctrine take root, or unrepentantly approving sinful lifestyles that are clearly and specifically forbidden in the scriptures.  In this case, fellowship must be abandoned, however first every effort should first be made to give those caught up in transgressions to see their error and repent, just as Matthew chapter 18 outlines.

 

4.                 VS 3:15  - 15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. – Paul tells the Colossians to let the peace of Christ rule in their hearts, to which they were called in one body, and to be thankful

 

4.1.         Paul states here that not only does the bond of unity in the body of Christ need to be love, we also must let ‘the peace of Christ rule’ in our hearts and lives, if we are to have unity in Christ.

 

4.2.         Jesus is the Prince of Peace, and He brings us peace with God, through justification and reconciliation, peace with mankind by removing the barriers between us, peace with oneself that surpasses understanding and guards our hearts, peace with families as each one fulfills their duty to each other, peace with brethren such that we can worship and work together, and peace between churches so that they can co-exist in harmony.

 

4.3.         Notice here that Paul gives a hint as to how the Lord works in the body of Christ.  He says that all those in the body ‘were called in one body’.  The body of Christ is not a religious organization, not to be a creation of man, but it is a spiritual organism and Christ “calls” each one into the body.

 

4.4.         The Greek word that is translated ‘rule’ here can also be translated as “act as umpire, guide and direct, to decide or determine.”  The ‘peace of Christ’ is intended to officiate and dominate in our lives and lead us in all that we do.

 

4.5.         A Christian is acting outside of God’s will for his/her life if he/she is not acting within the leading and dominion of God’s peace in his/her life. 

 

4.6.         I recently was pondering the Israelite nation as they were camping all of those forty years in the wilderness.  They had the fiery cloud of God’s presence over the tabernacle by night, and they had the cloud over them during the day.  The cloud provided them with shade and comfort each and every day, something that without which they probably would have perished in the desert heat.  They only would break camp and move when that cloud of God’s presence itself began to move.  This cloud to me seems to be a symbol or type of ‘the peace of Christ’ that is supposed to bring us comfort and rule over and guide the believer in Christ in New Testament times.

 

4.7.         James wrote about how that we as believers can determine God’s will in our lives based upon certain characteristics, one of which is the “peaceable-ness” of it:  James 3:17, “But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.”

 

4.8.         Before my wife and I were married, my freshman year at Bible college I became engaged to a girl there at the school after we had dated for three months.  She was a Christian gal, very pretty, and I liked her very much.  However, for the entire 9 months that we were engaged, I found that I constantly had a lack of peace in my heart about marrying her.  I prayed probably 20 minutes a day at least about whether I was supposed to marry this gal, but this lack of peace prevailed.  I found myself sort of shuddering inside at times thinking of living my whole life outside of God’s will for me.  I just really don’t understand how people can live out their lives outside of God’s calling and will for themselves.  Anyway, finally I just had to break up with this girl because of this lack of peace in my heart.  She was heart broken afterwards, and soon afterwards she married another guy.  This story just illustrates how God guides and protects us through His peace, or lack thereof, in our life.

 

4.9.         For the first of three times in our study, Paul tells the Colossians to ‘be thankful’ to the Lord.  Thankfulness is such a key to our spiritual growth, health, and usefulness.

 

5.                 VS 3:16  - 16 Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. – Paul tells the Colossians to let the word of Christ richly dwell within them, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in their hearts to God

 

5.1.         Paul makes it clear here how that the believer in Christ is supposed to be constantly taking in the word of God, and also sharing the word of God with others.  Unity itself cannot be preserved in the body of Christ unless each of us are continually growing in the knowledge of the Lord, letting His word dwell within us.  Jesus said that we are not even His disciples if we are not continuing to learn His word:  John 8:31, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine.”

 

5.1.         Paul says the word of God should ‘richly’ dwell within us, meaning that we need to saturate our hearts and minds with God’s word.  You cannot get too much of God’s word into your heart and mind.

 

5.2.         Paul says that it is ‘with all wisdom’ that we are to apply the word of God in other’s lives as well, ‘teaching and admonishing one another’.

 

5.3.         Further, the word of God is to lead the believer in his worship, and we are to sing praise songs to the Lord based upon the word of God, or sing scripture songs.  Singing has always been a part of the lives of Christians from the very beginning.  The Holy Spirit leads us to have hearts full of praise that we desire to sing unto Him.

 

5.4.         Paul reveals here three different types of songs that the believer is to sing:  psalms and hymns and spiritual songs’.  We’re not necessarily sure of the differences between these different types of songs to be sung to the Lord. 

 

5.5.         There have been numerous songs of worship that have come directly from the ‘psalms’, and even in the day when David wrote them it is believed that he sang them in worship to the Lord.

 

5.6.         Paul says that we are to sing ‘with thankfulness” in our hearts to the Lord.

 

6.                 VS 3:17  - 17 Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father. – Paul tells the Colossians to do whatever they do, whether it is in word or in deed, in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father

 

6.1.         We who are Christians ought to consider that everything that we do in this life, ‘in word or deed’, that we are to do it ‘in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ’.

 

6.2.         To do something ‘in the name of’ the Lord means to do it in such a way that it is a good representation of the nature and character of the Lord, that what we have done would have heaven’s approval and sanction.  If Jesus Christ were here in the flesh, He would do the exact same thing, because in attitude, motive, and action it represents the will of the Lord for our life.

 

6.3.         For the third time in this study Paul reminds us to do whatever it is that we do ‘giving thanks’ to the Lord.  As we carefully represent the Lord in the things that we do in our life, we are to do them with a thankful heart to the Lord.

 

6.4.         Our giving of thanks to the Lord is to be done ‘through Him’, that is through Christ, and through Christ ‘to God the Father’.  As we give thanks to and through Christ, we also are giving thanks to God the Father.

 

7.                 VS 3:18  - 18 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. – Paul tells the Colossians that those who are wives need to be subject to their husbands as is fitting in the Lord

 

7.1.         Paul says here that wives are to ‘be subject to your own husbands’.  The Greek word that is translated ‘be subject’ here in this verse has the following entry in Strong’s Enhanced Lexicon:

 

5293 ὑποτάσσω [hupotasso /hoop·ot·as·so/] v. From 5259 and 5021; TDNT 8:39; TDNTA 1156; GK 5718; 40 occurrences; AV translates as “put under” six times, “be subject unto” six times, “be subject to” five times, “submit (one’s) self unto” five times, “submit (one’s) self to” three times, “be in subjection unto” twice, “put in subjection under” once, and translated miscellaneously 12 times. 1 to arrange under, to subordinate. 2 to subject, put in subjection. 3 to subject one’s self, obey. 4 to submit to one’s control. 5 to yield to one’s admonition or advice. 6 to obey, be subject. Additional Information: A Greek military term meaning “to arrange [troop divisions] in a miliary fashion under the command of a leader”. In non-military use, it was “a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, and carrying a burden”.

 

7.2.         This verse speaks of the headship of the husband over his wife in the marriage relationship, just as Paul wrote to the Ephesians that this should be in the home:  Ephesians 5:22-23, “22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.”

 

7.3.         The husband and the wife in a marriage are equal, equal heirs under Christ, but the husband is given the final authority of matters in the home, though he needs to also lead and govern in a loving, godly, and consistent manner.  He should also seek his wife’s input in his decisions realizing that God gave him a help-meet as a partner to help him make good decisions.  Husbands should not operated independent of their wife and their wife’s counsel.

 

7.4.         Paul says that with the wife being ‘subject’ to her husband ‘is fitting in the Lord’.  According to God’s wisdom and understanding this is the order that is to be established in the home.

 

7.5.         The only time that a wife should not be ‘subject’ to her husband is if to do so would be to disobey the Lord.

 

8.                 VS 3:19  - 19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. – Paul tells the Colossians that those who are husbands need to love their wives and not become embittered against them

 

8.1.         Paul’s admonishment to the husbands in Colossae is to ‘love your wives’.  The wife is to be subject to her husband, and the husband is to “rule in love” over his wife and children in the home.

 

8.2.         Paul also tells the husbands that they are not to ‘be embittered against’ their wife, not hold grudges, but rather freely forgive and forget just in the same way that the Lord forgives each of us as believers when we have sinned.  Husbands can become ‘embittered’ against a wife that is not submissive, but they must not allow themselves to do this.

 

9.                 VS 3:20  - 20 Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. – Paul tells the Colossians that those who are children that they are to be obedient to their parents in all things because this is well-pleasing to the Lord

 

9.1.         Paul tells the children that their responsibility before the Lord is to ‘be obedient to your parents in all things’.  Obedience is to be the response of children and they are to be obedient unto their parents because they are obedient to the Lord, and being obedient children ‘is well-pleasing to the Lord’.

 

9.2.         Paul states here that a child’s obedience is not be selective, but they are to be obedient in ‘all things’.

 

9.3.         The only time that a child should refuse to obey their parents is if to do so would cause them to sin against the Lord.

 

9.4.         It is important to note that a child is only responsible to be in obedience to his/her parents while they are living at home, or until they have married and established their own home.  Then, they establish their own authority and  rules, those things that they determine to allow or disallow in their homes.

 

10.            VS 3:21  - 21 Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart. – Paul tells the fathers to not exasperate their children so that their children will not lose heart

 

10.1.    Paul tells the fathers that they should not ‘exasperate’ their children.  Fathers can be too strict and demand too much in the way of chores and labor for their children, and in this way ‘exasperate’ them.  Excessive teasing and provoking by parents can ‘exasperate’ children and thus must be avoided.

 

10.2.    Parents can make unreasonable demands upon their children that caused them to become exasperated, and this does not produce a good result in the life of their child.

 

10.3.    Paul states here that parents should not exasperate their children so that their children ‘will not lose heart’, or become discouraged, lose confidence, and even lose the desire to live.

 

11.            VS 3:22  - 22 Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. – Paul tells those who are slaves to obey their masters in all things and do it not with external service (“lip service”), but with sincerity of heart fearing the Lord

 

11.1.    Paul does not tell believers who are slaves to men that they now need to act as if they are emancipated, and refuse to be bossed around, etc., they way for instance happened in our country during the Civil Rights Movement era (60s). 

 

11.2.    Paul tells slaves that they need to ‘obey’ their earthly masters and do so ‘in all things’.  As long as to obey their master did not cause them to sin against God, slaves were to be obedient to their masters.

 

11.3.    The attitude with which slaves were to be obedient to their masters was not meant to be only on the ‘external’, or merely just give “lip service” obedience.  Rather, slaves were take it to heart that they were to obey their masters and do so ‘with sincerity of heart’.

 

11.4.    Because of the ‘fearing the Lord’, or great respect and reverence for the Lord, slaves were to be obedient from the heart to their masters, in all things.

 

12.            VS 3:23-24  - 23 Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. – Paul tells the Colossians that whenever they work that they are to work heartily (“hard”) and that they are to do their work for the Lord rather than for men, and that they are to know that it is from the Lord that they will receive the reward of their inheritance, for it is the Lord Christ whom they serve

 

12.1.    Paul tells the Colossians that when they do their work for their bosses or masters, that they were to ‘work heartily’.  One of the greatest witnesses we can be to the Lord is when we are simply working hard at whatever job it is we have been given to work.  Hard work and what is known as “the Protestant work ethic” is a good testimony to the people of this world that we know the Lord.

 

12.2.    Paul tells the Colossians that though they may work for men, that nonetheless even when they work ‘it is the Lord Christ whom you serve’ in reality, in all that they do.

 

13.            VS 3:25  - 25 For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality. – Paul tells the Colossians that if anyone does wrong that he shall suffer the consequences for the wrong that he has done, and this will occur with partiality

 

13.1.    This verse is a sober reminder that as Christians that if we chose to do ‘wrong’ that the Lord says that we ‘will receive the consequences of the wrong’.  We must not be so foolish as to think that we can sin and do harmful and foolish things and that the Lord is going to go behind us and protect us from suffering what is simply the normal consequences that occur to people for doing these things.

 

13.2.    For instance, if a Christian decides to have sex outside of monogamous marriage and thus sin against the Lord, he/she should not be surprised if he/she contracts a sexually transmitted disease in the process, or ends up conceiving a child in the process.  Or, if a Christian decides to go out and get drunk and then drive in an impaired condition, he should not be surprised if he gets stopped and thrown into jail or prison, or even if he/she causes a horrible car accident that takes innocent lives.  Each of us are promised by the Lord that we shall suffer the consequences of our actions.

 

13.3.    Paul says here that God treats us all the same way in regard to our suffering the consequences for our actions, for He does so ‘without partiality’.  None of us are so important to the Lord that He sets aside for us His laws and the consequences of not following them.

 

14.            CONCLUSIONS:

 

14.1.    Put on love the perfect bond of unity.

 

14.2.    Let the peace of God rule in your heart.

 

14.3.    Respect and be obedient in the various roles that the Lord has for you in life.

 

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