1 CORINTHIANS CHAPTER 7:17-39: “Instructions On Marriage & Divorce, No2

By

Jim Bomkamp

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1.                  INTRO:

1.1.            In our last study we looked at how Paul began to answer the questions which the Corinthians had written to him in a letter.  These questions concerned marriage, divorce, re-marriage, family, etc.

1.1.1.      We saw that the church in Corinth was really a messed up group.  The culture in which the church existed was so polluted that there were many things which most who became Christians would struggle with for years after coming to know Christ.

1.1.1.1.There were probably some in the church who had been married as many times as 20, there was immorality in the lives of some of the people in the church, some in the church were married to an unbelieving spouse, and there were people of various extremes in the church

1.1.1.2.We saw that the Greek philosophy of Gnosticism had corrupted the church because of it’s belief that a person’s body was totally evil and sinful.  This teaching produced two extremes:

1.1.1.2.1.Some believed that since your body was totally sinful that there was no hope for a person to be holy, and thus you could commit any sin that you wanted to commit and it was perfectly acceptable

1.1.1.2.2.Others believed that a person must separate themselves completely from any kind of bodily pleasure and even from society itself, as much as is possible.  This teaching led to asceticism in the church, people wanting to be cloistered away from all civilization

1.1.1.2.2.1.In the church, these people were advocating that a husband and wife should have no sexual relations since the body was so inherently sinful

1.1.2.      We saw that the other thing that affected Paul’s teachings in chapter 7, as he attempted to answer the Church’s questions concerning marriage and divorce, is that Paul believed that the Lord was going to be returning very soon.  Thus, Paul’s teaching majored on the practicalities of life in view of Christ’s soon return

1.2.            In our study today we are going to continue on with Paul’s answers to the questions which the Corinthian church had written to him about concerning marriage and divorce

1.2.1.      Paul tells the people to remain in the state in which they were called

1.2.2.      Paul then gives some further reasons for why he thought that it would be best not to marry

1.2.2.1.He tells them that in light ‘of the present distress’ that it would be better not to marry, but that if they had not been given the gift of celibacy, then they should plan on marrying someday

1.2.2.2.He tells them that the person who is married has to live to please his or her spouse, and therefore wholehearted devotion to the Lord is not possible for them

1.2.2.3.In our day today, we are living in exciting times, for I believe that it is apparent that we are living right on the brink of the Lord’s return to rapture the church.  Because of this time in which we are living, I think that each of us ought to really take the thought to heart that perhaps more so than at any other time in the history of man, it is important that we Christians try to maintain undistracted devotion to the Lord

1.2.2.3.1.There are people all around us who have so little time left to receive Christ into their life, and thus we ought to try to make the best use of our time in reaching out

1.2.2.3.2.But, even more so than sharing our faith in Christ and reaching out to the lost of this world, I believe that it is important that each of us place as our highest priority just sitting at the feet of Jesus and worshipping Him and learning from Him

2.                  VS 7:17-20  - 7:17  Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let him walk.  And thus I direct in all the churches.  Was any man called already circumcised?  Let him not become uncircumcised.  Has anyone been called in uncircumcision?  Let him not be circumcised.  Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing, but what matters is the keeping of the commandments of God.  7:20  Let each man remain in that condition in which he was called. -  Paul tells the Corinthians to stay in the state that they were in when they came to Christ

2.1.            In these verses we can see that Paul’s teaching implies many things.

2.1.1.      Paul tells the Corinthians in these verses that God’s purposes in working in people’s lives through effecting their salvation is to create internal changes within them, not to change their station or status in society or to reform the society around them. 

2.1.1.1.Social programs do not change peoples’ hearts, therefore even if the church were to significantly improve the condition of people’s lives, those same people would eventually end up in the same place or worse than they are today without the change of their heart which salvation brings. 

2.1.1.2.The only really effective way of changing a society is by the preaching of the gospel and the teaching of God’s word.  Then, as people come to know God and walk with Him, they will lead others to salvation and thus a society will be changed.

2.1.2.      Paul tells the Corinthians that it is better for them to simply stay in the station or societal status that they are in, and while there be heavenly minded and have a witness to those around them.

2.1.3.      Paul is also saying that it is OK in God’s sight to be a Christian even though you have a lowly status in society.

2.2.            Paul tells the Corinthians that in reality what really and ultimately matters in life is obeying the Lord’s will for their life, not whether or not they were or weren’t circumcised. 

2.2.1.      Paul tells the Romans in Rom. 2:28-29 that what really matters in a person’s life in the first place is the circumcision that is of the heart, “28 A man is not a Jew if he is only one outwardly, nor is circumcision merely outward and physical. 29 No, a man is a Jew if he is one inwardly; and circumcision is circumcision of the heart, by the Spirit, not by the written code. Such a man's praise is not from men, but from God”.

2.3.            Christ had the opportunity on numerous occasions to counsel people from various walks of life to change their station in life. 

2.3.1.      He could have told soldiers that it was not God’s will for them to serve a king or a nation or to go to war, yet He didn’t. 

2.3.2.      He could have told poor people that they did not need to remain in a low societal station, but He didn’t.  

2.3.3.      He could have told slaves to leave their masters and flee to freedom, but He didn’t. 

2.3.4.      He could have told people that they were subjects only of Jehovah, therefore they should not pay taxes to their worldy rulers, yet He told them to “Render unto Caesar what is Caesar’s”. 

2.3.5.      Jesus, as well as all of the apostles, were consistent in telling people that it was good for them to remain in their societal station and status.

2.4.            Paul tells the Corinthians that if they had come to the Lord as Gentiles, that they did not need to be circumcised in the tradition of the Jews.  Likewise, Paul tells the Jewish believers that they should not have the surgical procedure of reversing their circumcision so that they could become uncircumcised.

2.5.            We Christians today need to realize that in most cases it will be in our best interests to stay in the societal station in which we are in when we become Christians. 

2.5.1.      We certainly do not need to become wealthy in order for God to use our lives. 

2.5.2.      We do not need to have an advanced college degree. 

2.5.3.      In fact in almost every instance, Christians do not need to embrace another culture in order to grow in their relationship with Christ and be used by Him. 

2.5.4.      After becoming a Christian, we will likewise be used most effectively in the lives of those who are in the same societal station or status as we are in. 

2.5.5.      We need to stay where we are until the Lord leads us out of the place or station which we are in!

2.6.            If we are in a job that isn’t inherently sinful, such as say prostitution, then we can still serve the Lord in that job, even though the job may have its own difficulties.  For instance, lets say that a guy becomes a Christian while a bar tender, he shouldn’t necessarily go and immediately quit that job because he has become a Christian, though for some of course temptations in that job would be too great for them to be able to handle.  Rather, he can probably best be used by the Lord as a witness initially right in that very place where he is working, with those who know him best.  When the Lord leads him out of that Job, then he should leave, but only then.

2.6.1.      This does not mean that it will be wrong if we take advantage of opportunities in our lives to improve our making a living, especially if we are husbands and fathers.  In fact Paul says that one of the primary responsibilities for a husband and father is to provide for his own family.

2.7.            We can serve and sacrifice to the Lord to our hearts content, but if we aren’t obedient to the things He has shown us to do, God will not be pleased with our service and sacrifice.

2.8.            One thing that I have observed with new Christians is that it is often the case that not too long after committing their life to Christ they suddenly think that they have to make some big change.  I think of the friend that I had over 25 years ago who came to Christ and then after a couple of months of growing in Christ she was reading a trade magazine and suddenly felt that she was supposed to fulfill this desire she had had for years to move to Idaho and work on a chicken farm.  I thought this was a crazy thing for her to do, especially now that she had found a good church environment where she was able to grow.  She didn’t even really know what the people were like who were hiring for this job.  Well, despite my urging she ended up moving to this farm and taking up this career.  However, this move was just Satan’s ploy to draw her back to himself.  After she got there she discovered that the people were part of the Mormon church, and they eventually lured her into the church, and being a new Christian she didn’t have the discernment to know that she was in a cult.  Then, after a year passed she left the farm and moved away after she became disillusioned with the church, however by now she was so confused she now didn’t know what she believed.  Ever since that time she has done nothing but flounder around, and she has never gotten grounded in her faith in Christ.

2.9.            Many Christians are constantly going from one church and/or community to another, and thus they never are able to grow real spiritual roots.  My pastor once gave us this illustration in his teaching.  He said that if you wanted to take some plant and put it in your backyard, there would be no way that it could ever grow roots and then be able to take in the nourishment that it needs and grow strong if you were constantly digging it up and placing it somewhere else in your backyard.  In the same way, we Christians need to stay put in the church that the Lord has placed us in, that is, if it is a good balanced Bible teaching church.  We need that stability and environment and those friends if we are going to be able to grow up in our faith as Christians.

3.                  VS 7:21-24  - 7:21  Were you called while a slave?  Do not worry about it;  but if you are able also to become free, rather do that.  For he who was called in the Lord while a slave, is the Lord’s freedman;  likewise he who was called while free, is Christ’s slave.  You were bought with a price;  do not become slaves of men. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that they should stay as a slave if God called them while they were a slave

3.1.            There are some callings and conditions which are inherently sinful such as prostitution and criminal activity, but in most cases there is nothing that is inherently evil with a person’s profession.   In fact, even as a slave of another man one may be a very effective witness for Christ.

3.2.            Paul does say that if a Christian who is a slave has the legal and legitimate opportunity to buy his freedom, then he should seek to do so since He will better serve his real Master, the Lord, if he is a free man.

3.3.            Paul reminds the Corinthians that they already belong to the Lord, for they were bought with a price.  Therefore, if they have a legitimate and reasonable opportunity to obtain their freedom, they would be better off if they obtained it.

3.4.            We Christians should never think that any profession not inherently linked to a sinful activity is too low of a profession for us.  Instead of our testimony being soiled through a low status, it may even be advanced if we will submit to God and be Christ-like in our conduct.  God can use us in a powerful way, wherever we may be, if we will just submit ourselves to Him.

3.5.            We Christians must never lose sight of the fact that we are to be a God-pleaser in all we do in our lives.  We must not let ourselves become men-pleasers or be enslaved to men, unless we have been called to salvation while already a slave.  Even so, we all have one Master, the Lord of Lords and King of Kings, and we should in all things be subject and submissive to His will in our lives!

3.5.1.      Is Christ the Lord of your life today?  Is He the one calling the shots each day of your life?  If not, then get off the throne of your life and let Him be your Lord as well as your Savior.  He is a jealous God and will not settle for anything less from you, so you might just as well surrender to Him now!!!

4.                  VS 7:25  - 7:25  Now concerning virgins I have no command of the Lord, but I give an opinion as one who by the mercy of the Lord is trustworthy. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that what he is going to tell them next is his opinion, not a direct commandment from the Lord

4.1.            Though Paul does not have a word spoken directly from Jesus’ mouth concerning these next things he is going to teach, none the less, he is speaking under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, for he says that his opinion is the opinion of one who is trustworthy to reveal God’s will in the matter.

4.2.            Do not forget that we must infer from what Paul is saying that when he wrote the rest of the things that he wrote to churches that unless he says otherwise, his words came directly from commandment from Jesus.

5.                  VS 7:26-27  - 7:26  I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is.  Are you bound to a wife?  Do not seek to be released.  Are you released from a wife?  Do not seek a wife. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that because of the ‘present distress’ that it would be best for virgins and those presently not married to stay single

5.1.            Paul seemed to sense from the Lord and the present persecutions that the Christians were experiencing that the Christians in the day in which he was writing the letter to the Corinthians were about to come under a massive amount of persecution. 

5.1.1.      Jesus had prophetically spoken about this on a few occasions. 

5.1.2.      In fact, within 10 years of the writing of this letter ten successive Roman emperors took up an extremely cruel and thorough persecution of Christians that lasted for about three hundred years.  There were thousands of martyrs who died of horrible torturing and mutilations.

5.2.            In view of this distress which Paul knew was shortly to come upon Christians, Paul told the Corinthians that it would be better for them to remain unmarried if they were not presently married. 

5.2.1.      It is always much easier to escape or endure times of persecution if a person is not married.

5.3.            As I mentioned at the outset, Paul also believed that the Lord was going to return very soon, so his advice was very pragmatic with the view that establishing lasting ties in this world would not be as profitable as remaining single and serving the Lord with wholehearted devotion. 

5.4.            Paul believed that marriage was for life, so he never counseled believers to seek a divorce from their spouse.  If they were married they were to remain married and carry out their marital responsibilities as best as they could.

5.5.            If we Christians have decided that the Lord has not given us the gift of celibacy, and therefore that He has a plan for us to be married, then we need to realize that if we do marry, marriage is for life.  Who we marry is the most important decision that we will make in our entire life.  If the devil can get us to marry someone who will hinder or persecute us in our Christian life, he knows that he has us just where he wants us. 

5.5.1.      We must be sure that we marry the person that the Lord has for us to marry, as that decision will effect everything that we do for the rest of our life. 

5.5.2.      We should not just look at the external looks of people we would consider dating, but look at their commitment to Christ and their character. 

5.5.3.      We should seek someone who will be a ministry partner with us for life. 

5.5.4.      We need to look for someone who will help us to be more like Christ and encourage us to fulfill the calling that the Lord has for us.

5.6.            If Christ has called us to be single and serve Him, then we need to believe that He will more than compensate us with blessings for not having a mate in our life, for this is inferred in what Jesus promised to His disciples in Matt. 19:29, “29 And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life”.

6.                  VS 7:28  - 7:28  But if you should marry, you have not sinned;  and if a virgin should marry, she has not sinned.  Yet such will have trouble in this life, and I am trying to spare you. -   Paul tells the Corinthians that if they choose to marry they have not sinned

6.1.            Paul’s says to those who would marry that it is good also to be married and serve the Lord;  it is not a sin if any should marry.  Neither being single nor being married is better, it is best to be just where the Lord wants you to be.

6.2.            Paul’s advice in this verse is strictly on the practical level.  He tells the Corinthians that in light of the present distress of persecution beginning to occur, they will have more troubles in this life if they marry than if they remain single.  He says he is only trying to spare them these troubles.

6.2.1.      I mentioned in the last message that if the church followed Paul’s practical exhortation here and remained unmarried that it would have been easier on them when the massive persecution on the church began to occur at the hands of the Romans some ten years later.

6.3.            In this world today, we can see that the economies of the nations are on the verge of collapse, especially the U.S.  I believe that this is happening because the world is soon to enter the tribulation.  Therefore, it might again be best for us today in the church to prefer singleness to marriage, that is of course, only if we have the gift of celibacy from the Lord.

7.                  VS 7:29-31  - 7:29  But this I say, brethren, the time has been shortened, so that from now on those who have wives should be as though they had none;  and those who weep, as though they did not weep;  and those who rejoice, as though they did not rejoice;  and those who buy, as though they did not possess;  and those who use the world, as though they did not make full use of it;  for the form of this world is passing away. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that Christ’s return is to happen soon

7.1.            Paul believed that the Lord was soon to return for the church, and this affected his advice to the Corinthians, as we see revealed in this verse.  He also knew that this life if lived full term is very short.  He tells the Corinthians that the time was soon coming when they would be before the Lord, and they would not be able to take the things of this life with them.

7.2.            In Matt. 22:30, Jesus taught that believers would not be married in heaven, 30 At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven”.  Therefore, Paul in these verses says that in a day coming shortly, ‘those who have wives would be as though they had none’.

7.3.            In these verses, Paul contrasts life in heaven with life on this earth:

7.3.1.      In this life we all experience emotions that range from high to low, however in heaven all weeping shall be taken away, so Paul says that in that day coming, ‘Those who weep, as though they did not weep’.

7.3.2.      In this life, we rejoice about things that are strictly of a worldly nature, however in heaven the temporal things of this life will have passed away and not exist, therefore Paul says of that day, ‘those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice’.

7.3.3.      The possessions of this life we will not take with us into heaven, therefore Paul says, ‘those who buy as though they did not possess’.

7.3.4.      In this life we make use of the world’s goods, however in heaven we will wish that we concentrated more on the things that will last for eternity, therefore Paul says of that day, ‘those who use the world as though they did not make full use of it’.

7.3.5.      Paul tells the Corinthians that ‘the form’ of this world is passing away, which is to say that when Christ returns, He will reign over this world with His righteous government, and only those things that bring glory to Him will last for eternity, therefore the present “worldly” form of this world, its lusts, and its government is going to pass away.

7.4.            This life is so short compared to eternity, and I believe strongly that when we Christians get to heaven that we will wish at least for a brief time (as we appear before the Bema Judgment Seat of rewards for Christians) that we had been more single-minded during our stay on earth. 

7.4.1.      We will look at the things we have suffered in this life and we will wish that we had obeyed God more fully during those times and allowed Him to use those times to the maximum for His purposes.  In 2 Cor. 4:17-18, Paul writes to the Corinthians about how eternal concerns have so much more value than the fleeting temporal concerns of this life 2 Cor. 4:17-18, “17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal”.

7.4.1.1.I must remind you that ‘light and momentary troubles’ for Paul referred to beatings, stonings, being ship-wrecked, persecuted, worrying for the health of the church, etc.

7.4.2.      We Christians need to live for the things that will last for eternity.  It is foolish for us to try to hang on to anything of this world, since one day it is all going to burn.

7.4.3.      I want to ask you a rhetorical question.  If you were to die today and go to heaven, is there anything that is presently in your life which you would wish that you had done different in your life this week?

7.4.3.1.I think that most of us Christians would wish that we had made better use of our time while we were on earth.

7.4.3.2.I think also that most Christians would wish that they hadn’t gotten too involved in many worldly activities that in and of themselves aren’t sinful, they just kept them from the things that are eternal and therefore more important.

8.                  VS 7:32-34  - 7:32  But I want you to be free from concern.  One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord;  but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, and his interests are divided.  And the woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit;  but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that the one who is married must attend to his spouse’s needs and thus cannot be as fully focused on pleasing the Lord

8.1.            In these verses, Paul is giving his main reason for saying that it is better, if one has the gift of celibacy, to be unmarried:    The person who is unmarried can be freed up to be single-mindedly serving the Lord, ‘Concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord’, as well as being, ‘Holy both in body and spirit’. 

8.2.            The married person must be, ‘Concerned about the things of the world’, and how he must please his spouse. 

8.2.1.      A married man must be concerned about being a good provider for his wife and children, and a married woman must be concerned about how to meet the emotional and physical needs of her husband and children and she may have to work outside of the home as well.

9.                  VS 7:35  - 7:35  And this I say for your own benefit;  not to put a restraint upon you, but to promote what is seemly, and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that his advice to them is given as he has only their best interests in mind

9.1.            Paul is telling the Corinthian’s that what he is telling them is not so as to place them under bondage, but rather it is only for their own benefit.  What is for their own benefit is that which promotes those things that are ‘seemly’, to avoid the appearance of evil, and to promote ‘undistracted devotion to the Lord’.

9.2.            In Luke 10:38-42, we read the story of the day that Jesus visited the sisters, Mary and Martha, and we see in this story that Martha was busy and even serving Jesus in her busy-ness, yet it was her sister Mary who had undistracted devotion to Jesus, for she chose to do that which was much more important, she chose to spend her time sitting at the feet of Jesus, “38 Now as they were traveling along, He entered a certain village; and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home.39 And she had a sister called Mary, who moreover was listening to the Lord’s word, seated at His feet.40 But Martha was distracted with all her preparations; and she came up to Him, and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me.”41 But the Lord answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things;42 but only a few things are necessary, really only one, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.””

9.2.1.      It is good for Christians to want to serve the Lord, share their faith to the lost, and help in the church, but it is so much more important to prioritize our lives so that we make sitting at the feet of Jesus our highest priority in life.

9.2.2.      There is no service for the Lord that we should ever allow to be a supplement for spending that time personally with the Lord in our devotional life.

9.3.            Anna in the New Testament, the old woman who spent her time in the temple praying and fasting and waiting for the Messiah to return is another example of a woman who had single-minded devotion to the Lord.  The Lord honored her devotion and she saw with her eyes and held with her hands the Lord’s very Messiah when Jesus’ parents brought Him in.

10.              VS 7:36-38  - 7:36  But if any man thinks that he is acting unbecomingly toward his virgin daughter, if she should be of full age, and if she should be of full age, and if it must be so, let him do what he wishes, he does not sin;  let her marry.  But he who stands firm in his heart, being under no constraint, but has authority over his own will, and has decided this in his own heart, to keep his own virgin daughter, he will do well.  So then both he who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage, will do better. -  Paul gives the Corinthians advice about whether or not they should give their virgin daughter in marriage

10.1.        I want to point out here that in these verses that the word ‘daughter’ is in italics, and in the scriptures whenever a word is found in italics that means that the word isn’t actually there in the original language but has appeared there because the translator thought that adding this word would help in interpreting the author’s intent.  So, in the Green these verses just say ‘toward his virgin’, not ‘toward his virgin daughter’.

10.2.        These verses then are a bit problematic because we have to figure out who is the ‘virgin’ being referenced.  There are about four major views about this passage that are worth considering, however they all have their problems.  I will give the interpretation here that I believe is most likely correct: 

10.2.1.  In Paul’s day, parents arranged marriages for their sons and daughters as a matter of custom.  Some of the men in the church had decided to dedicate their daughters to the Lord.  Paul in these verses is answering the Corinthians’ question about whether or not it was OK to dedicate one’s daughter to the Lord and not arrange for her to be married. 

10.3.        Paul replies then that if a man’s virgin daughter whom he had dedicated to the Lord is of full age and desires to be married, that if he is struggling about whether or not he should allow her to be married, he does not sin if he does allow her to marry in the Lord. 

10.4.        Likewise, if a man is firm in his conviction to keep his daughter dedicated to serve the Lord unmarried, and there is no constraint upon him from her desiring to be married, that he will do well if he keeps his commitment to dedicate his daughter to serve the Lord as unmarried. 

10.5.        Paul says that in both cases the man will do well and will not have sinned, however the man who keeps his commitment to have his virgin daughter dedicated to serve the Lord as unmarried, he will do better.

11.              VS 7:39  - 7:39  A wife is bound as long as her husband lives;  but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.  But in my opinion she is happier if she remains as she is;  and I think that I also have the Spirit of God. -  Paul tells the Corinthians that if a person’s spouse dies that he is free to marry, only he must only marry another Christian

11.1.        It appears that in this verse that Paul is answering the question that the Corinthians asked:  “If your spouse dies are you free to remarry another Christian?”

11.2.        Marriage is for life, and a husband or a wife is bound in marriage according to the New Testament scriptures until one of three things happen:

11.2.1.  Their present spouse dies

11.2.2.  Their present spouse commits adultery and they believe it will be better for them to divorce

11.2.3.  Their present spouse is an unbeliever and departs not wanting to remain in the bond of marriage with them.

11.3.        Paul tells the Corinthians that a widow, that is if she has the gift of celibacy, will live a happier life if she remains unmarried.

11.4.        Paul writes in verse 40 that though he does not have a direct quote from the Lord concerning marriage, that nevertheless what he is saying has been under inspiration from the Lord.

11.5.        Happiness in life for a Christian does not come from their spouse, but rather it is to come from their relationship with the Lord.  People will often let us down, and therefore we must not look to people to make full our life;  however, the Lord will always make full our life if we will keep our eyes focused upon Him.

11.6.        I have known people who have come up with many different excuses for wanting to divorce their spouse, however as I mentioned in the last study there are only two acceptable scripture reasons for divorcing a spouse. 

11.6.1.  Not feeling like you are “in love” with your spouse is never an acceptable excuse for a believer to divorce his or her unbelieving spouse.  Marriage is a commitment “until death do us part”, therefore a married believer must trust God to give them the love they should have for their spouse, regardless of what they happen to be feeling.

11.6.2.  The people in one church I know of have excused the sin of divorce for one of their members saying that the woman’s spouse had committed “spiritual adultery” with her in his heart (not in the flesh however).  I think that the Lord knows when we are merely playing games with Him, however.

11.6.3.  Emotional abuse is not an acceptable excuse for a believer to divorce his or her believing spouse, and though I believe that there can be a case where a believer should move out of the house because of extreme emotional abuse, I think that you better be absolutely sure that this is what the Lord wants you to do before you do it.

11.6.3.1.  First of all, emotional abuse is undefined. 

11.6.3.2.Secondly, all marriages experience emotional abuse at times.

11.6.3.3.Third, when one moves out of the house both spouses are exposed to extreme temptations to sexual immorality which if committed can destroy any hope of reconciliation and devastate one’s Christian walk.

 

 

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